OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
