Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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