Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
