I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
