I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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