i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize