either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
