i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
