Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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