when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
