my vag is so smooth its legendary
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
