i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
