oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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