I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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