well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize