Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
