It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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