Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Someone shit on the floor
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
