How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
