doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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