It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
