just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I have tasted many bathrooms
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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