next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
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