this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
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