This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
