Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
