I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
