Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Randomize
