So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
