Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Randomize
