I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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