So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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