shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
