will power is for people who don't want to get laid
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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