You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He shit in the fireplace
I party with great urgency now.
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