I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
