Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
