There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
