You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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