Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
