Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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