great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
