So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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