As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Randomize
