ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
