Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
barbara walters just said penis...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
