Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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