You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
