AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
