It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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