did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
And then he peed in my hair
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